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me and gather me, though my elements be scattered throughout the silences of eternity, and again shall I come before you that I may speak with a voice born anew out of the heart of those boundless silences.

 

"O Mist, my sister, my sister Mist,

I am one with you now.

No longer am I a self.

The walls have fallen,

And the chains have broken;

I rise to you a mist,

And together we shall float upon the sea until life's second day,

When dawn shall lay you, dewdrops in a garden,

And me a babe upon the breast of a woman."

 

 

 

PART VII. SURRENDER

 

Baba says, "For those concerned, the Avatar is greater than God." Well, that Avatar has made of me one of those who are concerned.

 

What does it mean to say the Avatar is greater than God? For me it means that Baba is so vast, so boundless, so fathomless, that there is no room left for anything at all outside of Baba. He is the Drop in which is contained the Ocean.

 

Baba says, "It is truer to say that the universe is in a man than to say a man is in the universe." In the same way it is truer to say that God is in Meher Baba than to say Meher Baba is in God. How astounding to the mind it is to actually consider that Baba in the declared magnitude of His Self-knowledge leaves no room actually, for the existence of God outside of and beyond Baba, Himself.

 

The claim of infinity is a claim that can never be grasped or comprehended or even confronted by the finite mind alone. Meher Baba's claim of Godhood, with all that it implies, is a claim that can only be surrendered to. One can never take Baba's claim to one's self, but one must give one's self completely to that claim. And this giving of one's self is only made possible through love and the subse­quent obedience arising from that love.

 

Babajan was God, God in human form and God Beyond as well; yet Meher Baba said to me, "Babajan is in Me." There are many gods with many manifestations, many forms, aspects and attributes; but all of these have their existence in Meher Baba.

 

When one is with Baba one feels the urge to say, "Baba, you are so wonderful!" But one does not say it because one realizes that such words are silly and trite in the face of Reality. All words, adjectives, verbs, nouns, pronouns are meaningless in the presence of that Reality. That is, I am sure, why Meher Baba was silent.

 

Those who came to Baba in the early days did not know who in fact Baba really was. And so they were able to swallow the Ocean little by little. Those who come to Him now, however, are obliged to swallow that Ocean in one gulp.

 

When I heard of Meher Baba there was no time left in which to test out or get adjusted to His claim. I had to simply take it or leave it, or the opportunity would be lost in the flickering of human doubt.

 

To go to see a Master might be a nice thing, and very rewarding. But to go to see God, believing God to be Him, is a prospect so far beyond nice that it is entirely terrifying. It is this state of complete terror that accompanied me on my way to see Meher Baba that October morning.

 

As I stepped out of my sandals and across the threshold into Baba's presence,

 

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