away pride, reputation, self-importance. He takes away our health, etc. As He takes away all these veils we start complaining! We start shouting at Him! We say, "What is happening? I am suffering! Why is this happening to me!"

All the difficulties we experience are the result of our prayers to Baba. He is doing nothing more than removing the thing that separates us from Him, which is our own self. This very curtain, this very screen, that is in the way of the view between Meher Baba and us is none other than our own false self. Because of His love for us He has come to remove it — so we can see Him.

There are three types of Baba lovers, as Bhau Kalchuri explained. Each one of us at different times falls into one of these categories. There is one type of Baba lover who, when Baba calls, comes to Him. There is the second type of Baba lover who, when Baba calls, doesn't come. So Baba gently pulls his hand and he comes. Then there is the third type who, when Baba calls, does not respond. So Baba gently and lovingly pulls his hand: still he doesn't come. So then Baba picks up that lover and sets him on His head, whereapon that lover kicks and fights Baba and tries to get down!

Sometimes the same lover will follow Baba's call immediately. Yet at other times he resists Baba, kicking and screaming all the way. But in spite of all his efforts, Baba is still carrying him. Why? Because Baba has accepted his surrender. Baba is keeping His promise to us whether we cooperate with Him or not. He has accepted our longing for Him, our surrender to Him, in order to take away the veil that separates us from Him.

There is a beautiful story that expresses this so well. In the early sixties Padri had an order from Baba to inform Him whenever it rained in Meherabad. It rained a little bit. Padri had a little more time on his hands than usual so he wrote his note to Baba with a little more flamboyance than usual. He said something to the effect that because of the grace of God, etc., it rained in Meherabad. Baba got the note and was angry and upset at Padri because it rained at Meherabad and not at Meherazad. So He sent Padri the following note:

"Everything you cherish will be destroyed.

Everything you worked for will be uprooted, and

your very existence will be crushed out.

Thy utter ruination shall be."

Padri got this note and he was so happy, so joyful, he held it up to all about, as if to indicate that the note was proof from Baba that Baba would remove the veil that separates him from Baba. For those of us He really loves, He destroys everything we cherish, He uproots everything we worked for and He crushes out our very existence. For the things we cherish, the things we have worked for, are nothing other than the veils that separate us from Him. For those of us He really loves, He crushes our existence which is the veil that separates us from Him.

I wonder, has Baba left anyone in this room untouched? Is there anyone not experiencing enough grinding from Him? Isn't it wonderful how He can design for each us that circumstance and that situation which irritates us the most, cutting us to the core.

Recently I was going through a lot of difficulties. I talked to Eruch about it and he indicated that when you grab onto something and your hold on that particular situation gets cut off through suffering, the tendency, naturally, is to grab on to something else.

Eruch explained that at all times Baba has His gaze on us, out of the corner of His eye as it were. He is always aware of us but He doesn't necessarily have His full attention on us. But we should know that when things get so difficult, when the walls of illusion get too smooth to hold onto, at that time He has His full gaze of love upon us. When we have nowhere to go, no place of solace, no refuge anywhere in the world, then He has His full attention, His full love on us. At this time, if we take the opportunity, we can experience His love, because there is nowhere else to go for comfort but to Him.

There is a lovely story that expresses this. Eruch explained that at one time Baba was giving darshan to a small group of lovers in Mandali Hall. It was a very nice intimate program which included a musical performance. One young woman had her little baby